The Olympics make me feel fat

Jessica EnnisSo the Olympics are in my country. I’ve lived in London my whole life and love it so much but as a Londoner I feel I have license to criticise. London is very multicultural and that’s lovely as it means that we all grow up aware of different cultures and countries and traditions but it does mean that we have very little that we can identify as solely British. As a result I thought that hosting the Olympics may be a bit disastrous if not just plain boring but I can safely say that London has been doing a good job. They’re doing everything expected of them and I think we’re being good hosts.

So I’ve been proven wrong, well done team GB- we’re managing just fine. I thought that I would find the Olympics boring and that it would prove too hectic being in the middle of it all but I’m actually enjoying watching a few of the events and as I said before, I am content with Britain’s hosting skills (also was pleasantly surprised with the opening ceremony). The only thing that I am disliking about the Olympics is how unfit it makes me feel. I hate sport and I’m not pretending I enjoy it in any way but the Olympics are a constant reminder of why I should exercise more.

The beaming athletes with their rock hard abs and perfectly toned legs… things I could only dream of! talent and a good body. My parents raised me to be creative and well, they did a good job at that I guess but they never forced me to be sporty (admittedly because I lack key skills such as hand eye co ordination) I’m a good swimmer as I’ve been swimming since the age of 2 but bar that- absolutely no sporting abilities.

So as I lay on my sofa sipping my coffee watching the rest of the Olympics, I will be patriotic and enthused for my teams and the athletes that represent them. However, In addition to that I will also be feeling incredibly jealous of all the athletes competing and feel a bit bad about myself and my belly, thighs, arms etc…

Tes.

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Fashion’s a bully

Fashion is getting more and more ridiculous and “Out there”. It seems as though the craziest and most out there parts of the last ten decades are just thrown together: neons, Lycra, florals, bohemian, tassels, tie die, acid wash- all have stumbled into our fashion magazines again and although the lack of original fashion ideas does annoy me (I’m all for recycling but there’s no need to keep doing it in fashion) this isn’t what today’s little rant is about. No, what annoys me is how fashion really isn’t tailored to everyone.

First it was bodycon. The material designed to not only highlight but to accentuate every lump and bump on your body. Bodycon is possibly the most unflattering thing ever to have been invented, you may as well be naked because people are able to see the exact shape of your body anyways- not really leaving much to the imagination are you girls?

What annoys me more than bodycon? Sheer clothing. I mean seriously, when did it become acceptable to wear translucent clothing? and don’t get me started on those lace leotards and tops, it’s as if we’re just slowly eliminating the need for clothes, soon we’ll be walking around in just our underwear.

Oh wait… did I say “soon”? just looked outside my window to find a girl in a bralet, yes girls, dont bother wearing clothes anymore, just throw some pretty underwear on and you’re good to go.

My bitterness is evident, the only reason I’m complaining about these clothes is because I cannot pull of wearing them. Fashion is bullying me for not being thin so I’m having a little moan about it’s barely-there clothing. For all you girls who own this clothing and look good in it- I hate you. Thank god maxi skirts are still in fashion otherwise this summer would be hell for me!

Tes.