Chamomile tea and procrastination

Those little foam balls they hand out for stress relief do not solve any kind of problem. You can squeeze a stress reliever all you want but I don’t really comprehend what problem is so easy that it can be sorted with the simple action of squeezing a piece of foam.

I’ve been having a super stressful time lately and have consequently met a new side to me that, I have to say, isn’t very delightful. Deadlines and everyone else being equally stressed causes my natural charm and general loveliness to evaporate in a matter of seconds and worse of all, I’m not one to repress my feelings.  I, unfortunately, am the kind of girl to scream at the person next to me for accidently bumping into me or start crying uncontrollably because someone’s Facebook status tells me my friend has ‘finally’ finished the coursework I was proud to have completed the first paragraph for. Needless to say that my hulk-like behaviour needs to be tamed and although my first instinct is to drop out of school and lose hopes of ever getting a degree or do anything with my life, I highly doubt my parents will support me in that ideal.

A lot of my friends do odd things when they’re stressed or nervous. My best friend pulls out her eyebrow hair (which is truthfully a lot more disturbing for me than it is for her), another of my friends just shuts everyone out and lives in their own bubble choosing to ignore the world around them, my mum uses relaxation and meditation and my fellow students opt for procrastination in the hope that their deadlines will forget about them and run away. My point is, that stress is definitely not recreational and causes odd or anti social behaviour which leads to fall-outs, tears and tantrums, not to mention the occasional unwelcome grey hair.

I’m sipping camomile tea in the hope that, if nothing else, some sort of placebo affect is created and I feel a lot calmer and less likely to go into a fit of rage. Sorry for anyone who crosses paths with the stressed-out-me, feel free to shout back or hit me if I become annoying (although I fear I’ve already crossed that line).

Tes.

The danger of a haircut…

A lot of younger children have this supposedly irrational fear of going to the hairdressers. For the first 10 years of my brother’s life he refused to get his hair cut at a hairdresser’s salon and my mum’s friend would have to cut it at home, using the TV as a distraction. Despite that obviously being ridiculous I think that girls have every reason to be nervous or even scared of a getting a haircut. Fear of pigeons, daddy long legs or walking under ladders- they may be irrational because truthfully not much damage can be caused from any of those things but that is a lot more than can be said than a trip to the hairdressers…

The problem with going to a hairdresser is that more often than not they do exactly the opposite of what you want. This little rant is a consequence of my latest haircut disaster and sadly it’s not the first time I’ve left the hairdressers feeling a little disappointed. I spent about 60% of my childhood with hair that barely reached my chin and just when I thought id outgrown this, I got a disaster haircut at age 13 leaving me with a rather drag-queenesque curly afro that I spent the remainder of my secondary school life growing out and being extremely careful to get no more than a centimetre cut off on my occasional visits to the hairdresser (and I mean an actual centimetre not a hairdressing centimetre which always proves to be around 3 inches long). Being anaemic my hair takes an extraordinarily long time to grow and so I was extremely proud of finally having long hair after struggling for years and dealing with boy-hair. Unfortunately my Rapunzel days were short lived as I decided to go into the hairdressers for a ‘trim’.

An hour later….I arrived home with something resembling a scraggly poodle sitting uncomfortably on my head.

Hairdressers obviously know what they’re doing, what’s best for hair to be healthy and have volume but I don’t want that! I don’t mind having long unhealthy or dry hair because just having long hair is such an achievement for me but I do mind looking like my younger brother’s twin.

I spent about 45 minutes this morning in front of the mirror figuring out the most attractive way to style my new unfortunate haircut and sadly most attempts left me looking like pop star Mika. Looks like there’s no way out of this but to put on a brave face and pretend it looks exactly how I intended it to. Of course short hair suits some people (Mia Farrow, Emma Watson, Katie Holmes, and Victoria Beckham) but I am nowhere near glamorous enough to pull it off, I lack the overall beauty and confidence and what I look like now resembles a chubby boy scout rather than a celebrity goddess.

I urge you all to think long and hard before braving a trip to the hairdressers and to be crystal clear with your wishes, I have learnt time and time again that “just take a little off the end” leaves most hairdressers thinking they have full creative control and leaves me with another 3 years of growing out my horrid haircut.

Tes.

What is Friendship?

I think a lot of the time we underestimate the importance of friendship.

Friends a lot of the time are the cause of unnecessary stress and there are numerous occasions when I would be more than willing to murder some of them but at the end of the day it’s so easy to forgive them for all of those things because they’ll do something or say something that shows them exactly why you chose them as a friend in the first place.

Whenever you ask people what is important or what they look for in a friend they usually say traits like loyalty, helpfulness and kindness but if I think about my friendship group these are definitely not traits they possess. My friends constantly tease and taunt each other and the amount of fights there have been because of lack of loyalty and respect to each other is unreal. In fact, we act more like enemies than friends and most outsiders or anyone reading this would wonder why the hell we remain friends at all.

The truth is, none of those things matter, I can deal with the teasing and the nonsense because they do possess the quality I value the most and that is understanding. Our friendships have all had to endure various problems, some trivial but some a lot more serious and that little group of teenagers that I call my friends, they were perfect in those situations.

I don’t know if this applies to everyone but I don’t want friends who are nice to me all the time, constantly compliment me and share the same interests  as me, I enjoy having an eclectic group of people that are definitely not perfect but always there for me and each other when it counts.

I can confidently say that that’s what matters most to me in my friendships.

Tes.

Valentine-less

I’d never seen the big appeal in Valentine’s Day. I’m not really the relationship type and most of the time would rather be chilling out at home alone than dolling up to go out on a date but my friends are the complete opposite.

It’s quite scary come to think of it, the amount of girls who actually get depressed over not having a Valentine. It’s just one a day a year, a practically insignificant 24 hours that is meant to be enjoyed by couples but no, single girls have to turn it around and just use it as another excuse to feel sorry for themselves.

I went to an all girls school for the majority of my education but now I’m in a boy-dominated school It’s easier to spot the girls who care about valentines (usually the girls being extra flirty and cringe-worthy as February 14th beckons) to be frank, I feel uncomfortable just watching them. It’s easier for girls to be predators, most of you will know that teenage boys who’ve been in a single sex school for 5 years will respond and make a move on anything that looks even remotely interested in them and at parties, under the influence of alcohol it’s somehow acceptable, girls making the first move can even sometimes be viewed as empowering but it definitely isn’t if the reason behind it is the girls fear of being alone on valentine’s day.

Worse than the desperation that comes into view this time of year is the girls who act indifferent. Well, I shouldn’t use the word “act” so lightly. There are a lot of girls who want to give the impression that they don’t care about Valentine’s Day yet in enforcing their indifference feel the need to moan and bombard people with very detailed rehearsed explanations on how little they care about valentines, how “It’s just a commercial holiday” and how “you barely even remembered” it was in February. These girls are even more pathetic than the desperate couple-wannabees. I have the strongest urge to shake these girls and tell them to grow up, it’s okay to be single on Valentine’s Day, it doesn’t mean you’ll have to live the remainder of your life as a spinster and if you’re so “okay” with it please please please don’t feel obliged to tell me why.

It’s the first time all my girlfriends are single on Valentine’s Day and the most recently single of us wants us to spend it together. A proper anti-testosterone day, I’m happy to oblige because honestly I don’t have anything else or anyone else to spend the day on but the fact that we feel there’s a need to protest and pretend it’s our choice to have no males present is admittedly stupidly childish.

For those of you in relationships, enjoy February 14th and those of you who aren’t, please don’t spend the day under your duvet crying to the Notebook. Either embrace your single status or ignore the date completely because people’s reactions to the holiday are truthfully a lot more irritating than the concept of the day itself.

Tes.